The Gift of Breast Cancer

May 31, 2008

It's been three weeks since I learned I have a very early stage of breast cancer.

May 9, 2008 set my world into a tailspin to coin a phrase. I was prepared for the news moreso than my friends and family. I knew the diagnosis before it was confirmed. I could sense it based on the radiologist's tone of voice when I answered the phone that morning. So, at 11:30am while sitting in my comfortable office with a beautiful view of a lake and the interchange around Charlotte, my supposed many years before me shrunk dramatically.

The following weeks have been punctuated with looks of shock from friends, gasps and tears as well as many hugs, emails, and the standard "Let me know if I/we can do anything to help."

Mother's Day weekend was the Sunday following my diagnosis and I'm happy to say, that it was all a Mother's Day weekend should be. I spent it with my husband and children, my mother and father as well as my sister, brother-in-law and my niece and nephew. We visited Stone Mountain Park in Georgia. We had perfect weather while my husband and Sawyer, our 7 year old, watched the Laser Light Show while listening to Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol as well as basking in Southern culture dotted with Gone with the Wind references, Georgia on My Mind and The Devil Went Down to Georgia. Talk about making a Georgia Peach feel at home!!

As far as I'm concerned, my Breast Cancer gave us all a Gift that weekend. That probably sounds really odd but for once all my family just lived in the moment instead of letting petty differences cause us to argue and generally be cranky for no reason. So a few little crazy cells in my left breast brought PEACE to everyone although I could sense the fear in my parents' eyes and their voices. Even with that, this trip was laced with calm and acceptance. I was determined to have a joyous and celebratory Mother's Day and I think everyone benefited from it.



In the meantime, the unwavering support and love from friends and colleagues has been another wonderful gift. You know, it's really a shame that we don't get a chance to hear firsthand what we mean to others. Take funerals for example... what good does it do to wait to stand up at the church alter and then blubber on about how the person meant to us?? Geez. Talk about a day late and a dollar short! But I'm glad to say that I'm the fortunate one who got to hear the sincere concern.

I felt the hugs, saw the smiles, heard the kind words, enjoyed the text messages from friends on my phone that made me laugh. For a small moment in time, I was fortunate enough to know what my life means to others. That is a gift that I will remember for as long as I live.

Now I'm going to get really deep for a moment. Put on your SCUBA gear cause I'm going down to the depths where the fish don't need eyes kind of deep.

It's all so brief and it goes by like the blink of an eye, like sand through a sieve or water under a bridge, etc. Pick your favorite. Regardless, it's not forever but we act as if this Temporary gift is never-ending. What a terrible way to live life.

Now, I know better. I thought I knew before but I was only quasi-thankful and in tune with the brevity. Now I really know.

I can't think of a better gift.